C’thulhu

Cell: 555-666-7777
Email:

I am an outgoing and energetic (ask anybody) young professional, seeking a
career that fits my professional skills, personality, and murderous tendencies.
My squid-like head is a masterful problem solver and inspires fear in who gaze upon it.
I can bring world domination to your organization.

Education

Withering Madness University – Planet Vhoorl

Major: Public Relations
Minor: Scale Tending

Skills

Office skills

Office and records management, database administration, event organization, customer support, travel coordination

Computer skills

Microsoft productivity software (Word, Excel, etc), Adobe Creative Suite, Windows

Experience

Doomsday Cult Leader/Overlord – Baton Rogue, LA – 1926-2010

  • Inspired and won highest peasant death competition among servants
  • Helped coordinate managers to grow cult following
  • Provided untimely deaths to all who opposed

The Watering Hole Bartender/Server – Milwaukee, WI – 2009

  • Worked on grass-roots promotional campaigns
  • Reduced theft and property damage percentages
  • Janitorial work, Laundry
Hobbies
World Domination, Deep Sea Diving, Murder Most Foul
References
Available on request